Their Story...
Our journey began over 14 years ago, very improbably. Garrett had been out of another relationship for about a year, and I had been searching for someone for 6 years. I was living and working in the metro Washington, DC area, but also maintained a more permanent home in Fort Worth, TX. It is often said that God works in mysterious ways, and I am here to tell you that's absolutely true! I originally moved to DC in the Fall of 1999 in what can only be described as a mid-life crisis. I found a job and townhouse (not necessarily in that order) and moved up there to "find myself", as they say. As much as I loved my family, we were all just too closely knit... and they did not in any way, shape, or form embrace my sexuality.
During my 5 years there, I dated men occasionally, but nothing ever really seemed to click. My mother and aunt were declining a bit, and I had made the quiet decision that once they were gone, I would pull up stakes in Texas, and move permanently to Washington, DC. Their health began to decline more rapidly, so I was making more and more trips across country to check on them. One such trip in early 2003 was supposed to be four days. It turned out to last four months! As the only child, it fell to me to oversee their care and well-being. So, as soon as I could wind things up in DC, I decided to move back home to Ft Worth.
In addition to overseeing their care and transition to care facilities, I started to re-establish myself in Ft Worth. Most of my time and energy was devoted to them, and while I was happy to do that, I felt really alone. One evening at dinner with a couple of friends, and spilling my heart out to them, they suggested that I go online to try and meet someone. Well, that was just way beyond my comfort zone, but ultimately, I decided to give it a try. I started dating, but again, no real connection. You really do have to "kiss a lot of frogs", so to speak! HA! The feeling of loneliness never went away, and finally, I gave my problem to God. During lots of prayer and meditation, I looked within myself and did an honest self-assessment of my strengths and weaknesses, and what I needed in a life partner... or what I thought I needed. Fast-forward a couple of months.......
While searching through the dating website, I could tell who was viewing my profile. Garrett's profile kept popping up. Finally, I messaged him to say hello. We started chatting online and got to know each other just a bit that way. In April of that year, we decided to meet for a first date. I had always been very careful to meet at a local restaurant, but for some reason, I told him to come by the house and we would go to dinner from there. Armed with my mental checklist, the more we talked, the more checks were being checked off! Try saying that 5 times, very quickly! You see, as I said before, I told God what was in my heart, and talking to Garrett on that first date, I began to see some very specific things being answered... all without my prompting. You remember my decision to pull up stakes and move back to DC? Well, come to find out that Garrett was up for a promotion at work, which would require him to move to.... wait for it.... Washington, DC. Things like this happened all during the evening. Our first date turned out to be the beginning of our journey together. I used to say that he came over and never went home. After awhile, I realized that what actually happened was that he found his home. We both fell hard for one another, and quickly. Never before had I wanted to know someone so completely. It turns out he felt the same way.
It is often said that relationships are hard work. I guess that is partly true, but it seems that, at the same time, ours has been almost effortless. We joke that it is a good thing we found each other because no one else would have us. We just "get" each other! One time, I asked Garrett if he had any regrets in our relationship. He said no and asked me the same thing. I told him yes, there was just one... that we had not met earlier in life. He thought a moment and replied: "No, if we had, we would not have been ready for each other."
Five years into our relationship, I woke up one morning and glanced over at Garrett. Out of the blue, I was struck with an overwhelming sense that nothing in life was more important than marrying this man. He woke up, and looked at me and quizzically said: 'Whaaaat?" I told him my feelings, and asked him to marry me. His reply? "I was wondering when you were going to ask me!". We started making plans and did a destination wedding... in Washington, DC...on top of the Hay Adams Hotel... looking directly down on the White House. Pretty amazing stuff! Couples often share that there are jitters along the way, but neither of us had any. We just knew that we were meant to be together, and this was the next step in our journey. We were married on the very hottest day in late July 2011. In front of our friends, our ceremony opened with my favorite Scripture: "This is the day that the Lord has made. Let us rejoice!" And we did just that!
There are those that would condemn us to Hell for being gay, and would have our right to marry wiped away in a heartbeat. I cannot wrap my mind around such cruelty. I have to believe that just as I poured my heart out to God about a life-mate, that he more than answered my prayers. Did I get everything that I thought was important? No. I can't speak entirely for Garrett, but I believe I received something far better... the person that God knew I needed. And isn't it funny that what I had longed for all those years was pretty much in my own back yard, so to speak! We never did make the move back to Washington. We remain in Ft Worth, living openly and honestly. And what was once "my" history and "his" history, has wonderfully become "our" history!
